Nightmare
by ratatatkat
Summary: There is a certain fragility surrounding the concept of innocence. A cruel, sad sentiment that Riku won't soon forget.


I was warned this would happen.

The memories turned over in my mind, pulling me out of my unfortunate reality.

_If you treat them like objects, that is what they will become._

The 'me' then, he didn't understand. It was just another cryptic metaphor. Even if I was taller in Yen Sid's tower, his meaning sailed right over my head. I politely held my tongue to avoid questioning a Master.

If I had looked to Sora there, in that moment, I might have begun to understand. If I could have seen the knowing glint in his eye, the accepting seriousness of the statement. I suspect he had realized what the Dream Eaters symbolized in this test of heart right from the very beginning. They weren't just tools of power. They were our allies, our friends. We were supposed to treat them as such.

I did try, right from the very beginning. The bat-like creature that had greeted me under the dim lights of Traverse Town seemed overjoyed to simply come into existence. I admittedly couldn't help but smile at the monster; not only a refreshingly different coloration than its nightmarish counterparts, but a different disposition altogether. Its green eyes glowed with warmth as I acted on the impulse to pet it. Mere moments had passed, and it had already accepted me as its Master.

However, I steadily coasted away from such touching sentiments as my escapade in the nostalgic city ran its grinding course. I had practically forced myself to detach from every aspect of the environment at hand, and my new 'friend' fell into no exception. What choice did I have? Reliving the shameful memories I had constructed for myself in these very districts simply wasn't an option. The prospect was far too painful.

And yet, even as I tried to lock it away, the negativity reached me. It bubbled up in the form of the anger, frustration, and resentment I felt for the mysterious boy in the black cloak. Those emotions in turn personified themselves as violence. Fighting them off, striking them down… It was mindless, but it satiated me, for however short a time.

But the worst part? It didn't even notice I was slipping, not at first. Not as my antagonistic grunts and taunts grew louder and louder. Not as my swings and jabs themselves augmented in crude force. Not even as my own knuckles fell deathly white as I clutched the hilt of my blade, staring defiantly into those jarringly saturated golden eyes.

As it enabled my rage to fester, I definitely didn't notice my flaws when I was lent the energy to link. Instead of being thankful and indebted to their provider, I selfishly relished the powers of ever-useful demonic wings that sprouted out my shoulders.

It was only when they disappeared that I truly began to notice.

And by then, it was simply too late.

I had found myself once more in the unfortunate reality of the present.

I winced as I clutched the bare skin of my shoulder, nervously searching the room for signs of my enemy. The eerie reflections of the nighttime sky passed its fragmented light through the glass ceiling, casting vibrant but still tones of color on the hanging gardens. It was only when I was met with such subtle silence that I began to recall the matters of true importance to my conscious.

I somberly realized my ally was not at my side.

Hesitantly, I raised my Keyblade and muttered a spell I was well-versed on. The green light and its accompanying health bathed my damaged body, but the outside reciprocation I was listening for did not come. The peal of relief from a freshly-healed spirit was now merely a distant chime in my imagination.

Somehow, I managed to suppress a depressing thought and rendered my mind blank and analytical as I started down the stairs. My head never stopped its constant scanning swivel, diligently picking every inch of air around me in search of my companion. As I my descent steepened and I was left with nothing but a fruitless effort, it grew undeniably harder to ignore the growing obviousness that it was hopeless.

And, even as my stare had turned down, I didn't notice the telling evidence on the ground floor before me until I had accidentally tapped it with the blunt of my shoe. It made a small _plink_ as it bounced against the similar figments around it, all radiating the same vibrantly colored but virtually lifeless sheen.

I froze in my steps and stared down at the pile. My mind went blank for a good few moments, but soon the fact of my failure dawned on me along with a small flurry of unexpected emotions.

I felt helpless as I stared, and that feeling wrought an immediate shame. How careless of me; my exam had just barely begun, I had already failed the most important test. I had attained the power I wanted, but I hadn't used it to protect the things that mattered.

As I came to my sad realizations, I was filled with a sense of deep regret. It was only natural that my broken desire to correct it in any way I could intensified as well.

I found my hands shaky as I bent down to collect the pieces in my arms. It was a small pile; a simple pattern of about four or five translucent shards that could be easily arranged once again, to create a new spirit.

I hesitated.

The guilt of my mistake seemed to weigh impossibly heavy as I held the motionless figments in my possession. My mouth hung open lamely as I struggled to formulate an adequate expression of remorse.

"I… I'm sorry."

It was all I managed to confess to no living thing in particular.

Without another word I squeezed my eyes shut and extended my grasp, willing my own energy to surge out from my heart along to my very fingers. The pieces hummed and shuffled themselves, floating out into the air and overlaying in a blinding light that whirred with new life. An upbeat chime of magic rang as the flash peaked, and I was greeted again with a familiar excited squeal.

I opened my eyes to find the creation successful. The creature looked practically identical to its predecessor, upholding almost every physical detail saves for one.

"I'm…"

It spun around and flashed me a quizzical expression as its newly purple eyes knit with curiosity. I can only guess that a simple and innocent fascination captivated the creature as it heard the voice of its new friend for the first time.

"…I'm Riku."


End file.
